Falling Slowly
by dear songbird
Summary: She never wanted conflict with Rachel Berry. She never expected to see Jesse. St. James ever again, nor did she expect him to provoke a silence she had once vowed to take. Too bad for her, conflict was all she got. JsJ/OC
1. Real Competition

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any characters you recognize. They belong to Fox. However, everyone you don't recognize is mine! :)

**Author's Note: ** This chapter is short, but sweet. I loved writing from Rachel's point of view...she's absolutely neurotic!

* * *

Rachel Berry knew she hated Gabrielle Adams the minute she stepped into the Glee Club's practice room and opened her mouth.

"Mr. Schue," her voice had been timid and quiet, "I think I'd like to take up your offer on joining Glee."

"Of course, Gabi!" Mr. Schue nodded in delight. His hands beckoned her into the classroom. "Come in, come in."

The midget girl tiptoed her way into the room with a shy smile on her face. Rachel tried not to glare, but it was hard. This Gabi girl was petite—no, she was a midget! Rachel wondered how a person could be so tiny. Trying to get past the girl's height, Rachel studied the rest of her features. She had a delicate face that was paired with bright blue eyes. Her face was framed with inexcusably untamed, long, brown hair. She wore a floral romper with a jean jacket and summer sandals. Rachel noticed that her toenails were painted a light pink.

Rachel wanted to snort.

"Everyone, this is Gabrielle Adams. Not only is she new to school, but she is also the newest addition to Glee," he announced.

Rachel fidgeted in her chair. She raised her hand and again, tried not to glare at Gabi. Everyone turned to look at her. "Excuse me, Mr. Schue?"

"Yes, Rachel?" Mr. Schue sighed. Rachel pretended not to hear it and ignored her teammates' questioning stares.

"Doesn't she have to _audition_ first? I mean, what if she can't _even_ sing?" Rachel knew how uptight and rude she sounded, but she didn't care. There was no way this dwarf was going to be a part of Glee—it wasn't happening on her watch. She could tell that Gabi wouldn't fit in with the status quo. She was too tiny, too timid, too _unassured_ of herself to belong to the group of ambitious and determined people.

Strike one.

"Don't be so rude, Rachel," said Finn. He looked shocked and confused at Rachel's outburst.

Rachel watched him shoot Gabi an apologetic look on herbehalf and felt outraged. Why should _she _have to _apologize_? She just asked a _question_, and if the new girl was going to be _sensitive_ about it, maybe she should think twice about joining Glee. She then noticed that Gabi looked uncomfortable and felt a pang of remorse. "No offense, Gabrielle," she sighed.

Gabi tried to shrug indifferently. "None taken. I understand that you guys have been working hard for Regionals and don't want to risk just letting _anyone _in the club." She paused. A small smile worked its way onto her face. "Oh, and you can call me Gabi."

"Sure," Rachel said back, returning with a (fake) smile of her own. She decided that was going to call the intruding midget Gabrielle just to push her buttons.

"Okay," said Mr. Schue slowly, trying to get things out of awkward territory, "moving on...Rachel, I understand your concerns, but I've known Gabi since she was three; she's going to make a wonderful addition to our team. She's a hard worker, very dedicated, and extremely talented. I know many of you probably don't know this, but Gabi was actually recruited to join the Broadway revival of _Les Misérables_ as Cosette, so there's no need to worry about her abilities. She's perfect for the club."

Rachel felt her face go red. _Les Mis_ was _her_ favorite musical! She _would_ have been at the open calls in New York City, but her fathers' thought it was better if she focused more on passing Algebra instead of castles' on clouds. Rachel pouted and crossed her legs.

Gabi had the audacity to blush.

Strike two.

Rachel wanted to march up to her and smack that stupid, embarrassed looking facial expression she was wearing right off her face. Instead, she took a deep breath and said, "You've known her since she was three?"

"Gabi's parents went to high school with me. We were all in Glee together."

_Great_, Rachel thought to herself. _Just great. Now I actually have to work to be the favorite._

"What are you going to sing?" asked Rachel.

"Um, a song called 'One Day I'll Fly Away'," said Gabi, still looking slightly timid.

"Good luck." Rachel smiled again. Of course, it was a fake smile, but no one could tell, so what was the point?

Gabi smiled back and began to sing.

"_I follow the night,  
Can't stand the light.  
When will I begin  
To live again?_"

Rachel couldn't believe it. There was no way; it was impossible. She stared at the tiny girl who was belting out the first few notes of Randy Crawford's _One Day I'll Fly Away_. Her voice was smoother than Randy's ever was, and held a whole hell of a lot more emotion than Nicole Kidman's pitiful rendition in _Moulin Rouge!_ ever did. She also didn't go flat on almost every other note the way Nicole did. Suddenly, Rachel felt very threatened.

"_One day I'll fly away,  
Leave all this to yesterday.  
What more could your love do for me?  
When will love be through with me?_"

No, no, no, no! Absolutely not! This was ludicrous! Surely this was just a really bad dream—no, a nightmare, and she would be waking up soon. Yes, a nightmare! That made sense. Rachel pinched herself.

Okay, so it wasn't a nightmare. But still, it was impossible.

"_Why live life from dream to dream?  
And dread the day when dreaming ends?_"

Rachel began squirming in her chair.

_Okay, so the midget girl can sing_, she thought. _And sure, maybe she can sing wonderfully acapella and has a flawless vibrato, but that doesn't mean anything. I'm still the best. I'm Rachel Berry, for God's sake._

Finn nudged her.

Her eyes snapped up at him. "What?" she mouthed.

"What's wrong with you?" he mouthed back.

"Nothing. Just pay attention to the midget—I mean Gabi—sing."

"_One day I'll fly away,  
Leave all this to yesterday.  
Why live life from dream to dream?  
And dread the day when dreaming ends?_"

Rachel looked back over at Finn and couldn't help but gape. Finn had actually listened to what she said; he was paying attention to Gabi! But it was a different type of attention, Rachel could tell. He had a funny, but familiar, look on his face, and his eyes were glazed over in awe. He looked starstruck; he looked like Gabi was the only person in the room. Rachel tried recalling why the face was so familiar, and when it finally hit her, she wanted to jump up and scream. No! This was _NOT _happening to her! That was the look Finn got in his eyes when _she_ sang! Finn was supposed to look _her_ with awe, not some new, midget girl! Finn was supposed to think that _she_ was incredible—wait, Finn? Rachel's eyes widened. She shouldn't care about who Finn looked at because she had Jesse. Jesse. Right. Her boyfriend—at least, Rachel thought he was. She _hoped _he still was. After the whole 'Run Joey Run' fiasco, Rachel wasn't sure if he felt the same way. He had abruptly left on a Spring Break trip with some of his Vocal Adrenaline friends, and refused to return her phone calls.

Rachel decided to believe that he was just really busy and that he wasn't screening his phone calls. Maybe she was in denial, maybe she wasn't. It wasn't her place to decide.

She looked over at Puck since looking at Finn was no longer an option. Again, she dropped her mouth. Puck was staring at the dwarf like he was looking at a really big piece of steak. There was a predatory glint in his eyes and he looked like he was a tiger, ready to pounce on a gazelle. Or maybe it was lions that ate gazelles? Rachel didn't really care at the moment because she knew that Noah wasn't even paying attention to Gabi's voice, no, he was just _staring_ at her.

Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong! This was all so very wrong!

"_One day I'll fly away.  
Fly, fly away._"

Everyone began to applaud once Gabi finished. Rachel just sat there, looking shocked.

It was impossible. Rachel Berry had real competition. Sure, Mercedes had a great voice, but really, could anyone ever really picture _her_ singing a crowd-pleasing ballad the same way Rachel had? Of course not, that was a stupid question.

"After watching your performance, I've decided that we need you," announced Kurt. "Not only is your voice absolute perfection, but you have impeccable taste. Rompers are very in right now, as is floral, so kudos to you for the outfit. Also, that jean jacket you've paired it with is to die for. Lastly, those sandals give you a very summery feel. Your makeup completes the look with a certain—_je ne sais quoi_."

"Tone it down a little Kurt, won't you?" chuckled Mercedes.

"How tall are you?" asked Brittany.

"You're hot," said Puck.

"I agree," seconded Finn.

Mr. Schue only looked on with a proud smile on his face.

"Thank you all so much," said Gabi. "I really appreciate it."

Rachel wanted to explode. This was _so_ not happening to her.

Strike three.


	2. Promises, Promises

**Author's Note: **I was just really excited about this chapter since Jesse comes into it, that I _had_ to type it up. Jesse's a little out of character in this chapter, but I assure you that it doesn't happen often. My lovely arrogant Jesse comes back after this :) I'm not really why I find arrogance attractive seeing as it shouldn't be an attractive trait. My beta (Brianna) says she's excited to see Jesse be a prick, and let me tell you, I am too! On a side note, I can't believe that it's 4:04 AM right now. Darn me and my summer naps. They prevent me from actually sleeping at night!

To **ClanaFan01**, thank you so much for my first review on this story! :)  
To **thrufirewithoutaburn**, I agree. Rachel and Jesse are too much alike. I believe that opposites attract!

Oh, and one of my favorite songs in the ENTIRE world is _Open Arms_ by Journey, so duh, I referenced it in this chapter. Fitting? Yes.

_"So now I come to you, with open arms,  
Nothing to hide, believe what I say.  
So here I am, with open arms,  
Hoping you'll see what your love means to me.  
Open arms."_

—Open Arms / Journey

* * *

The rest of the week went by devastatingly slow for Rachel. Though she had been utterly thrilled with the assignment, and reprimanding, Mr. Schue had given the club—after she caught members of the club not participating, she had insulted them and felt a lot better—she was still concerned about her standing now that Gabrielle Adams was out to steal her spotlight. Rachel supposed she _could_ confront the girl, but where was the class in that? It would be blatantly standoffish and rude—she'd never live it down if she pulled through. Rachel Berry knew she was a lot of things, and classy was one of them. Sure she had been a _tad_ impolite on Monday, but in her defense, she was under a lot of stress! Jesse still hadn't returned any of her calls or text messages, and she was desperate to speak to him. And now that the stress was _gone_—he would be back at school on Monday and couldn't ignore her _there_—there was no way she was going to ruin the image she had so worked on, _Sure_, maybe the rest of the school didn't _appreciate_ or _notice_ the image that _she_ wanted them to see—she didn't blame them, they were only in high school, after all, they didn't understand _talent_—but once she was a star, once she was on _Broadway_, they'd always remember her as poised, elegant, and calm.

So when Monday came with a new week, Rachel was fully prepared to spring back into her star mode. She smiled to herself as she shut her locker. She was ready for Glee Club today.

Jesse, however, was nowhere in sight. She felt a little put off, but didn't like it get to her. Instead, she convinced Quinn and Mercedes to spy on Vocal Adrenaline after Kurt discovered _they_ were doing GaGa. It was ingenious, really. Lady GaGa was a _phenomenon_! With a little convincing, Mr. Schue too decided that _they_ would use Lady GaGa as that week's assignment, and she had been overjoyed. She was even looking forward to the boys' performance of...well, whatever it was they were going to perform.

On Tuesday, a part of Rachel's chipper attitude from Monday had worn off, but she was still upbeat, nonetheless. The girls, and Kurt, had decided to do _Bad Romance_. She was so excited that Gabi hadn't even crossed her mind once!

"Rachel."

Rachel's heart sped up. She _knew_ that voice! Quickly, she turned her head around to greet the owner of the voice. "Jesse," she said with a big smile. "How was San Diego?"

"It was nice," was his short reply.

She _knew_ something was off. And she _knew_ that he was still upset over the video; it was obvious. She wanted to scream and yank at her hair. She didn't actually _like_ Finn or Puck, she only wanted _Jesse_; she just wanted to give herself a new reputation. Of course, she now realized how silly wanting to have a bad reputation was and saw the error of her ways. How could he be so unforgiving? She was just a teenage girl!

"Before you say anything," Jesse held up his hand and ran it through his curly hair, "I don't want to talk about what happened before I left. It's plain to see that you long for something I can't give you, so I want to end this before _I_ get hurt again."

Rachel was shocked. "Jesse, I _don't_ want Finn or Puck. I want you."

"You have a funny way of showing it," he bit back.

"Honestly, Jesse, the video—it was nothing, can we just talk about it?"

"I'm not really not in the mood to discuss this with you right now," said Jesse as he strutted passed her and into his AP French class. Unlike everyone else at McKinely, Jesse found Spanish to be a very horrible language and found no desire to learn it. He was one of the few who not only took French, but also _excelled_ in it.

"We're going to talk about this, Jesse," Rachel grabbed his arm from behind. "After Glee Club, we're going to fix this, alright?"

"Whatever."

Rachel sighed. It was going to be a long day after all.

* * *

Gabi frowned. She sat alone in her AP French class, waiting for the first bell to ring and thinking about many things.

It was her second week at McKinely High, and she was still having trouble adjusting to her new life. Everything seemed to be backwards. When she had attended Carmel High before she moved to New York, glee clubbers were practically worshipped—especially Jesse St. James. The kids at her old Ohio high school had treated him like a god on Earth. She snorted and gave herself a mental pat on the back for never joining Carmel's Glee Club. The way she saw it, there were too many overly ambitious snobs like Jesse, and she had no wish to be around people like _that_. She was far too simple, too _plain_ to want a life full of ambition.

She was still frowning when she thought of how Mr. Schue had announced her part of the _Les Mis_ Broadway revival. Yes, she had been specifically scouted for the roll, but she didn't even _want_ it. It was all her grandmother's doing, anyway. The stupid, old woman practically forced Gabi's mother to move them to the Big Apple after they learned about her father's torrid love affair. Gabi shivered. She didn't want to think about her father with another woman—it was just so _wrong_.

Still, she didn't blame him for leaving her crazy mother. How could they be a normal family when her mother only thought of bringing her daughter to fame? She understood that her father had finally had enough, and that he couldn't bear to see her struggle against her overbearing mother. She also understood that he was too _weak_ to stand up for his own _daughter_ and that he'd rather escape, saving his _own_ skin, rather than help _her_. Surprisingly, she wasn't bitter. She'd met plenty of wonderfully talented people whilst in New York City who taught her a lot about showbiz and 'making it'.

She frowned deeper. Her thought process moved on from her confusion with school and dysfunctional family to Glee Club. Their assignment for the week was Lady GaGa. Kurt and the girls' had already picked out the song they would perform as a group. They chose 'Bad Romance'. Gabi wanted to grimace. She _hated_ that song almost as much as she hated Lady GaGa. She didn't understand the hype. GaGa was just a wannabe Madonna. She felt sick knowing that she would be berated for not dressing the part. When she got to school that morning, she noticed that all the girls in Glee had dressed as a different GaGa whereas she had opted to wear jeans and a grey _Promises, Promises_ shirt. Oh yes, she was definitely going to be scrutinized even more.

Suddenly, a pile of books fell onto her desk. "This is my seat."

"Well _I'm_ sitting here right now, aren't I? I guess you'll have to find a new seat," said Gabi in a snarky voice. She looked up to find a pair gorgeous blue eyes staring at her. She gasped. She could recognize those eyes _anywhere_.

"Jesse St. James?" she choked, already feeling butterflies in her stomach.

"Jesse St. James? I thought we knew each other too well for formalities," he joked with a smile. Gabi could tell that he was equally surprised to see her; he just did a good job of hiding it.

"Things change," she retorted, mimicking his playful tone. "So do people."

He cocked an eyebrow at her. "So does that mean you don't find me devastatingly handsome anymore?"

"It's nice knowing that _you_ haven't changed since I last saw you," snorted Gabi. She smiled flirtatiously at him before grabbing his books and shoving them back at him. He grunted. She gave him an innocent smile before saying, "Go find yourself a new seat, St. James. I'm not moving. You were gone for a week, so this is my seat now."

He grinned pompously and walked over to the desk on her right. She rolled his eyes as he scooted his desk closer to hers. He took her right hand in his and gently kissed her palm. She shivered involuntarily. He grinned again. "So does this mean that you're still irretrievably in love with me?"

"Are you still the same asshole I dated two years ago?"

"Yes," he answered immediately. He still had her hand in his.

"Then I guess yes," Gabi blushed before offering Jesse a shy smile, "I am still irreversibly in love with you."

"I'm glad," he said softly, kissing her hand again. "You know, Gabi, I missed you everyday you were gone. You don't have to act shy around me—I _know_ you, Gabrielle. I know you. I know your story."

The first bell rang.

"I missed you too, Jesse."

* * *

Jesse knew how wrong it was to lead Gabi on like that. He knew that he was with Rachel and that he shouldn't have flirted with the other girl—but that was the thing. He knew, and he didn't care. All he could think about was Gabi's surprised face when she saw him. The smell of her pomegranate and apple shampoo that lingered in the air around her. Her childish laughter after hearing him joke around with her. The softness of her skin. Her hand in his. Her voice telling him how much she loved him. He wanted to know why she was back—she had moved to New York City a year ago, leaving him all alone. Why hadn't she kept in touch with him? Why didn't she even bother telling him that she'd be back? Why was she attending McKinely and not Carmel? Did she leave behind a boyfriend in New York? Did she really miss him as much as he had missed her? Did _she_ think about him as often as _he_ thought of her?

He was a man obsessed, and he knew it.

Well, he didn't really think he was _obsessed_, per se. He did, however, know he was in love.

That's why when he was supposed to be conjugating reflexive verbs in French, the only thing Jesse could picture was the first time he slept with Gabi.

They'd only been fifteen at the time, and she was nervous as hell. He smiled. He could recall how badly she'd been shaking. They made out on his bed for twenty minutes or so before Jesse decided that he wanted her. When he asked her if she wanted to have sex with him, she paled and went limp in his arms.

"_I—I'm not ready, Jesse," she had said. The shaking had begun. "We're too young."_

"_You're never too young to be in love," he said back, running a thumb over her bottom lip. "And I love you with all my heart, Gabi."_

"_We're only fifteen," she whispered. "We're too young."_

"_I love you," he insisted. "Feel this." He took her hand and guided it over to his chest. While staring into her eyes, he placed her hand over his heart. "I love you," he repeated. "I love you in this moment, and I'll love you after it's over. I'm here with open arms; I'm yours. Forever yours, faithfully."_

_Gabi had smiled faintly. He quoted her two favorite Journey songs. "I love you too."_

Jesse's smiled widened. He really had fallen in love with the small girl at the age of fifteen; it wasn't a lie.

His phone buzzed, breaking him out of his daydream. He stole a glance to his left and saw Gabi's head turned to the front of the room, giving their teacher all of her attention, and he felt his heart flutter. He adored how she gave everything her all. Still smiling, he reached into his pocket to check his phone.

**ONE NEW MESSAGE.**

His smile turned into a small frown when he opened the text message. It read:

_Jesse, I really am sorry. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me before we see each other after school—I'm putting my pride on the line for you, just by apologizing. I love you, Jesse. Please._

Jesse felt like a bastard. He was fantasizing about his ex-girlfriend while his current girlfriend worried her head off, trying to win his forgiveness. It was all very wrong and deceitful. He felt dirty.

"Jesse?" asked Gabi quietly. "Are you okay?"

His head snapped in her direction. "Huh? Oh, I'm fine, Gabs."

"Are you sure?" He nodded slowly and she bit her lip. "Class is over, Jesse. You've been sitting there, staring off into space for the past five minutes."

"Oh."

"Where's your next class?" She held her hand out for him to grab. "We can walk together."

He only stared at her hand. Before he knew it, he was pushing it away. He saw a range of emotions run through her. First shock, then confusion, then hurt, then nothing. "I'm sorry," he apologized. "I don't know why I did that."

Her face softened a little. "It's fine," she said in a tiny voice.

"Gabs, I really am sorry." As soon as he stood up, she fell into his arms. His arms moved on their own accord, pulling her small body closer to his. He unconsciously inhaled, and as soon as her signature smell went to his brain, he felt his whole body ignite. He was on fire whenever he was with her. He felt like he was a fifteen-year-old boy falling in love for the first time all over again.

"I love you, Jesse," murmured Gabi against his chest.

He pictured Rachel's smiling face.

Then, the feeling of euphoria abruptly left his body just as quickly as it had entered. In its place, a feeling of immense guilt took over. He felt dirty again.

He was the world's biggest asshole.

"Are you okay, Jes?" she pulled away and asked once more. "You haven't said anything."

"I have a girlfriend," he blurted out. He couldn't stop himself; it was like word vomit.

Her blue eyes hardened into ice, and Jesse could see her walls going up. He wanted to pull her back into him, telling her that everything would be okay—but it wasn't, so he didn't cause he _couldn't_ promise something like that. It was promising a lie to the girl he loved. It was wrong.

"_Don't touch me_," she hissed, shoving him away from her. "You're_ vile_."

Yes, Jesse St. James really was the world's biggest asshole.


	3. Love's Keen Sting

**Author's Note: **Bam, another update. I know, I know. I'm amazing. I can't help it; I'm addicted to this story. I borrowed the last line of this chapter from the _Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince_ movie. Ah, HP, my first love. Special thanks to my AMAZING beta, Brianna who just encourages me in every single way—not just with writing, but with everything that goes on in my crazy life. I absolutely adore you! :)

To **thrufirewithoutaburn**, your compliments make my head big. No joke. I kinda feel like I'm Superwoman or something right now...it's bad. I don't really think I'm in any position to be giving out advice since I'm terribly insecure about this story, but when I write in the different point of view's, I just imagine that I'm that person, you know? So when I write for Rachel (which is my absolute favorite, by the way), I take all of _my_ ambition and I channel that into my writing. I take my irrational, overcritical, and slightly insane side and pretend I am Rachel. I think that if you can find a little bit of yourself in your characters, it makes them easier to write. Rachel is a very plucky character, as am I sometimes. When I write for Gabi, though you won't see it now, I use all of my angst and anger. I also kinda picture what they would say in certain moments...like I play out conversations in my head. I hope that helps! I'm excited for what you come up with!  
To **Allyrien Chantel de Montreve**, I understand your concern, and thanks for the criticism! Your review made me really happy. :) Honestly, at this point, Gabi only seems "perfect" because I'm only three chapters into the story. I tried really hard not to make her into a Mary-Sue, but I'm afraid as of right now, she is. However, as this progresses, the reader is going to be able to dissect her atom by atom. I don't want to give anything away, but her parents' split created a negative impact on her psyche. There's also something else in her past that makes her push herself the way she does. She is a completely different Gabi than the Gabi that Jesse, Rachel, Finn, Will, etc. see her as—she's just an exceptional actress so her walls are sturdy enough to help her get by day by day without confronting conflict. It may or may not be morbid or sadistic of me, but I want to build Gabi up to an unreachable place and once she thinks she's safe, I want all of it to come crumbling down on her just to see if she can pick herself up. As for Puck and Finn's interest in her, it all goes along with the plot line. The way I wanted to write this story was in a way that hinted (maybe, if people can catch onto it—I'm not sure because I don't think I write well enough for people to pick up on symbolism or anything) that appearances are nothing cause we all have skeletons in our closets, and even though it's easier to put up a facade, the truth is always the best answer to deal with.

_"Set me free, leave me be.  
I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.  
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be.  
But you're onto me and all over me."_

—Gravity / Sarah Bareilles

**

* * *

**Gabi sat in the practice room with a big frown on her face. Seeing as Glee Club didn't start for another thirty minutes, the choir room was empty. The way she saw it, she had three options: she could go along with the girls' 'Bad Romance' number, she could do her own GaGa number—the only GaGa song she found slightly tolerable was 'Speechless' seeing as she loved ballads—and be completed shunned by her fellow teammates, or she could get up and leave while she had the chance. There was no way she was going to perform _Bad Romance_, and it wasn't in her nature to give up _that_ easily. So her second option was the only one she had left.

She felt so stressed! Maybe she should just give up music and do something mundane and ordinary: like becoming a doctor or accountant.

Twenty-five minutes left until Glee started.

"Well," she said aloud, "it's now or never. And since never isn't an option, I guess I should go ahead and warm up." Gabi walked over to the piano, sat down, and stretched her hands out. After cracking each knuckle, she began to sing her usual warm-ups.

Ten more minutes left of peace.

Gabi's fingers swiftly shifted gears and started playing the first song that came to mind.

"_Now, don't just walk away  
Pretending everything's okay  
And you don't care about me  
And I know there's just no use  
When all your lies become your truths and I don't care_

_Could you look me in the eye?  
And tell me that you're happy now?  
Would you tell it to my face or have I been erased?  
Are you happy now?  
Are you happy now?_"

She could feel her heart aching once she realized what song she was singing. She pictured her, age fifteen and so in love with one Jesse St. James. She pictured his face when he told her he was seeing someone. She pictured an anvil falling onto the asshole's head. She smiled as more pictures of a bloody Jesse went through her mind. It _inspired_ her. Fingers pounding on the piano, heart and soul stripped naked through song—Gabi wasn't made for show choir. She had _too_ much heart. She should have convinced her mom to stay in New York. She belonged in theatre. She belonged to a world where she didn't have to face her reality; to a world where she could be anyone she wanted to be—anyone but _her_.

"_You took all there was to take,  
And left me with an empty plate  
And you don't care about it.  
And I am givin' up this game  
And leaving you with all the blame cause I don't care_

_Could you look me in the eye?  
And tell me that you're happy now?  
Would you tell it to my face or have I been erased?  
Are you happy now?  
Are you happy now?  
Are you happy now?_"

Gabi was so into the song—and picturing Jesse's death—that she didn't notice a tall brunette boy with broad shoulders enter the practice room. She heard the door close and her hands left the piano immediately. She looked to see who had interrupted her and saw Finn Hudson.

"Don't stop just cause I'm here," he said, smiling and nodding. "You're amazing."

She smiled back shyly, fingers resuming their place.

"_Do you really have everything you want?  
You can't ever give somethin' you ain't got  
You can't run away from yourself._"

A part of her wondered whom Jesse was dating, but the _sensible_ part of her decided that she didn't care. Jesse St. James was old news. She was going to start over, start brand new.

"_Could you look me in the eye?  
And tell me that you're happy now?  
Come on; tell it to my face  
Or have I been replaced?  
Are you happy now?  
Are you happy now?_"

She wondered if Jesse was happy with his new girlfriend. She hoped he wasn't. He didn't deserve happiness.

"_Would you look me in the eye?  
Could you look me in the eye?  
I've had all that I can take,  
I'm not about to break  
Cause I'm happy now.  
Are you happy now?_"

There! She was finished. She breathed a sigh of relief. The feeling was incredible; it was like a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

"So who was it?" Finn gave her a sympathetic look.

"Who was _what_?"

He chuckled. "Who was the guy that broke your heart and made you so scornful?"

Gabi look appalled. "I am _not_ scornful! Scorn is an unattractive trait and I take pride knowing that I am _not_ scornful. Ever."

"Okay, okay," he conceded with another laugh. "But a guy did break your heart, didn't he? You can't just fake emotion like that—I would know."

"Yeah, there was a guy," she murmured, recalling Finn singing _Jessie's Girl_ to that Rachel Berry girl last week as a part of their assignment from Mr. Schue. Wait, _Jessie's Girl_? Jessie? Jesse? Jesse, as in Jesse St. James, Jesse? She _had _to know now. The sensible part of her who didn't care suddenly _did_ care, so that meant that every fiber of her being _cared_ and needed to know if Jesse was dating Rachel. "Is there a boy named Jesse in the club, Finn?"

Finn's face stiffened. His ears turned bright red and he looked like he wanted to strangle somebody—and Gabi just _knew_. "Yeah, there is," he grunted angrily. "He's a huge asshole, if you ask me."

"He isn't Jesse St. James, by any chance, is he? Jesse St. James from Vocal Adrenaline?" Gabi could hear her heart pounding in her ears. _Please say no, please say no!_ She wanted to hear him deny it with a: "No, Gabi, there isn't a Jesse St. James in Glee Club. Why would you ask something silly like that?" She _needed_ him to say it wasn't true—that she was going out on a limb.

"Yes," was his single worded answer. It was short, but it was enough. In that one word, she could tell of the heartache Jesse had cause Finn. She could feel his shame and unhappiness. Gabi felt a surge of anger and humiliation course through her. She suddenly felt very sorry for herself, for Finn, for everyone else Jesse had wronged. She knew what it was like being on the receiving end of his hate, his hurt, and his unshielded deception.

"Wait," said Finn, "how did you know that?" He looked at her questioningly. "Didn't you just move here? Jesse's been in San Diego..." his voice trailed off. He eyed Gabi suspiciously. "Wait—are you a Vocal Adrenaline spy?"

"I _dated_ Jesse when I went to Carmel High," snorted Gabi. Finn wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed, was he? If she were a _spy_, why would she tell _him_? "He's in my AP French class, I saw him and—I don't know, for some reason—I mean, I just _assumed_ that he wouldn't be in Glee Club. A part of me thought that maybe he'd given that all up since he transferred schools—I mean, _really_."

Finn, however, didn't hear anything past her first sentence. "_You_ dated _Jesse_?" He asked the question like he didn't believe her.

"Yeah—yeah, I did. Why?"

"You just don't look like you'd _go _for a guy like St. James," he shrugged. "You're a nice girl. But I'm not saying that Rachel isn't a nice girl for dating him—she's amazing—I think I'm in love with—sorry, I'm getting distracted."

"_You're_ in _love_ with _Rachel_?" asked Gabi, surprised. She thought Finn was only upset because Jesse had stolen the male lead of the group. Rachel seemed too much like Jesse for Finn's taste. She shrugged to herself. The heart wanted what the heart wanted. Gabi decided that at that moment, her heart wanted to see Jesse St. James being thrown off the Empire State Building. Maybe she could have that arranged for her to see one day in the future.

"No, no!" Finn shook his head quickly, blushing while doing so. "What I _meant_ to say was Jesse's full of it. He walks around like he _owns_ the place." He looked thoughtful for a moment. "But I guess it's a good thing we have two former Vocal Adrenaline members on our team now. Our shot at winning Regionals just went up, I think."

Gabi snorted again. "I wasn't in Vocal Adrenaline when I went to Carmel."

"You weren't?" Confusion swept onto his handsome face once more.

"No," she shook her head, "I wasn't. I was in theatre, not show choir. I don't think Jesse wanted me in Glee, anyway. He was never one to share spotlight."

"Sounds like him. How long did you two date?"

She grimaced. It was painful to think about how much of her life had actually been spent with Jesse. She had tried so hard to make believe that it didn't hurt all day—but it only made it worse. She was a wreck inside. Her tongue was tied—it didn't _want_ to talk about Jesse anymore, and her body was weak—she needed to _stop_ imagining his arms around her. She could tell that it was written all over her face and she inwardly scolded herself She was an _actress_. Her walls needed to go back up! So, she tried to come off as nonchalant and uncaring when she finally answered Finn's question. "We met when we were in the third grade and started dating when we were in the seventh grade. I moved before our junior year."

"Wow," said Finn with a whistle. "That's like, what—three years?"

"Five," corrected Gabi. "We dated for five years. Our birthdays are a week apart...we started dating when we were twelve and broke up when we were seventeen."

They sat in silence for several minutes.

60 seconds until Glee started.

"I know you just found out that Jesse's dating Rachel, but how do you deal with that?" asked Finn, breaking the silence.

She gave him a sad smile. "I don't."

* * *

Rachel stood outside the practice room, waiting for Jesse. They were usually the first people there, but today, he was running late. She was confused. She apologized profusely, sent him sweet text messages all day long, but she _still_ didn't get a reply from him. She _wanted_ everything to be better before Glee started. She was beginning to become impatient with the whole thing. _Yes_, he was upset, but it was in the past. He was a big boy. He needed to _move on_. They were supposed to be _happy_—how could they be happy if he was too busy sulking about a video?

She anxiously tapped her foot, trying to rid herself of her anxiety. Where in the world was Jesse? She was about to give up and just enter the room when she heard voices coming from the other side of the door. Curious, she got closer, but was careful not to reveal herself.

Finn was laughing. Rachel smiled. He always had a pleasant sounding laugh. Sometimes she wanted to hear him laugh all the time.

"How do you _not_ deal with something like that?" he asked.

"I don't know," a girl answered. "So far, today has been just been absolutely terrible, though."

They unnamed girl and Finn were silent before Finn spoke. "You might not have Jesse anymore, but I'll be here if you need to talk to anyone," he said.

Rachel felt guilty for eavesdropping, but she couldn't help it, really. Finn was one of her best friends, and even though he had hurt her many times in the past, she still wanted to look out for him. She _needed_ to know who this girl was! If she was someone in Glee, why couldn't Rachel recognize her voice? Finn knew better than to go down the road that consisted of Brittany and Santana again, and she _highly_ doubted that he would be interested in Tina or Mercedes, so who could it be? If it was a girl who wasn't a part of Glee, what were they doing in the choir room? It didn't make any sense...unless...no, that wasn't possible. Rachel chuckled to herself for even thinking that Finn would be interested in the midget—and _wait_! Did Finn just say _Jesse_'s name?

"Finn, that's very sweet of you and all, but I don't think—"

"I'm serious, Gabi. There's no use in suffering alone if you can suffer with someone else by your side."

Rachel froze. _No!_ Not Gabi! Suddenly, her good mood flew out the window and she was extremely peeved. Everything always came back to _Gabi_, didn't it? How could Finn possibly be interested in a girl like that? And what did he mean about _suffering_ together? God, it sounded so morbid. What was so interesting about Gabi anyway? Sure, she was talented, but Rachel was talented too. Rachel was even _taller_ than Gabi. If Gabi and Finn dated, Gabi would look like his little _sister_. It was stupid. She wanted to barge into the choir room and tell them how _stupid_ they were. She wanted to tell Finn that he was an idiot for finding Gabi attractive, and to tell Gabi that she should just leave McKinely and go back to New York because she wasn't wanted _or_ needed.

But she didn't because she was a nice person. That and she was too nosy for her own good so wanted to hear the rest of their conversation.

And _why_ had Finn mentioned Jesse? How did Gabi even know him, anyhow? It was only her second week there, and Jesse hadn't been to any of the Glee meetings the week before; maybe Gabi was a senior and had a _class_ with Jesse? Rachel tried to think back to last Monday when Gabi introduced herself. How old was she again? Thirteen? She honestly couldn't remember, so maybe Gabi was talking about a _different_ Jesse. Yes, that made more sense.

"I really appreciate it, Finn. I mean it," said Gabi. Rachel wanted to barf. "You don't know what it means to me—knowing that I have a friend here. I _thought_ that I'd have Jesse, but considering, well—you know—yeah. I just—I'm really glad."

"What are you doing, Berry?" Puck's voice startled Rachel. She jumped a little before conjuring an innocent smile.

"Just waiting for Jesse. Have you seen him?" she asked, smoothing out her GaGa inspired dress.

"Do I look like I care about your boyfriend's whereabouts, Rachel? Cause I really don't," said Puck, looking annoyed and bored. "Can you move now? I want to go inside and you're in my way."

"Sure, sure." Rachel rolled her eyes and stepped away from the door.

"Thanks."

"Whatever," she shrugged. "Just know that Gabrielle Adams and Finn are in there talking right now, and I don't think they want to be disturbed. They were talking about suffering and God knows what. Oh my _God_, Puck! What if she's trying to get Finn to join a freaky voodoo cult or something? We should stop it, shouldn't we?"

"Gabs is talking to _Finn_?" Jesse's voice appeared out of nowhere. "Why's she talking to _him _in _there_?"

Gabs? _Gabs_? _Gabs? _Why was Jesse calling the midget _Gabs_?_!_

"Gabs?" sneered Rachel with disdain. "Since when is she _Gabs_ to you?"

Jesse only looked at her with a blank face.

Rachel was seething on the inside. She wanted answers, and she wanted them _now_!

"This looks like a personal problem, so I'm gonna go," Puck pointed both hands at the door and took his exit. Rachel and Jesse both ignored him and continued to stare at each other.

"Well, Jesse? Aren't you going to answer my question?"

* * *

Jesse glared at Rachel. He didn't want to deal with whatever it was she wanted him to deal with. He still felt guilty about what happened with Gabi that morning and was definitely _not_ going to be telling Rachel about it. "I'm going in," he said, ignoring her question. "We'll talk about it later."

"No, Jesse!" Rachel stopped her foot. "I want to talk about it _now_!"

"Well I _don't_, so you can just wait until Glee is _over_," he snapped back. He gently pushed her aside and entered the choir room. Jesse's head instinctively searched for Gabi's face and felt betrayed when he saw how close she was sitting with Finn. How could she do something like that to him? How could she even _breathe_ the same air that—wait, he needed to stop thinking about Gabi. Really, he did. He was determined to fix his relationship—or whatever it was they had—with Rachel.

But if he had decided to be with Rachel, why did he feel so hurt knowing that Gabi was smiling and laughing along with Finn Hudson?

_Oh, to be young and to feel love's keen sting._


	4. Teamwork and Sacrifice

**Author's Note:** Here's the fourth chapter! My beta is out of town, so I had to proof this on my own. Any mistakes that you see are my own, and I'd reeeeally appreciate it if you could point them out for me :) Thank you so much for reading! Now, I'm not gonna beg for reviews, but a bunch of people have favorited/put this story on their alert thingies, but I only have six reviews. I don't really care if you have to offer constructive criticism (which makes me really happy; I try to defend myself [duh], but I really do take it all to heart when I write) or just a "read it and enjoyed it" type of line. Toss me a bone, guys!

To **Allyrien Chantel de Montreve**, when I wrote the first part of this chapter in Quinn's perspective, I thought of you. I don't really want to make everything too obvious, and I feel like Quinn would be the most perceptive since everyone tends to just see her as the pregger ex-cheerleader.  
To **thrufirewithoutaburn_, _**you flatter me. Don't be nervous, I'm definitely enjoying your story so far.

You don't get lyrics this time because I don't feel like putting them there.

* * *

Quinn Fabray wasn't _stupid_. Sure, she was _pregnant_, but just because she was carrying a _baby_ didn't mean she was no longer carrying a _brain_. She rolled her eyes. It was _so_ obvious that there was unresolved tension, or something like that—Quinn was an ex-cheerleader, not a shrink—between the new girl and Rachel's oddly good looking boyfriend. (Sometimes Quinn wondered how Man Hands scored a guy like him, but then she remembered how high maintenance they both were. She stopped caring after she got to that point.) Not only was the tension obvious, it hung around the air, thick and heavy, making Quinn feel like she was being dragged down by it.

Her shoulders drooped a little as she tried to relax. The girls were about to perform their number, and she didn't want to be tense.

"Gabi," she heard Mr. Schuester ask, "why aren't you up there with the rest of the group?"

Quinn turned to face Gabi. She tilted her head to the left and slightly pursed her lips. Why _wasn't_ Gabi up there with them?

"Mr. Schue, I'm really sorry, but I just can't _do_ GaGa."

Quinn dropped her jaw. _Couldn't _do _GaGa_? What was she, a boy or an alien?

"I—I don't think I understand, Gab," Mr. Schue shook his head. "The assignment for the week was to a GaGa number."

"I know, and well—I just prefer ballads, I guess...so," Gabi took a deep breath, "I was wondering if I could do a number on my own? This way I'm still completing the assignment without having to compromise myself."

"I personally don't see how performing a GaGa number would be _compromising_ yourself," said Rachel snobbishly. "I mean you already decided to not dress the part. A good performer takes shortcut whereas a _true_ performer can pull of _anything_. Just because you hate or are scared of something doesn't mean you can just completely avoid it. You stand up and face the challenge, head-on. The real world doesn't always work the way you want it to. Sometimes you have to make sacrifices to make things happen."

Quinn was puzzled when she saw Jesse go rigid at Rachel's words, and she was even more puzzled when she saw his eyes dart to Gabi's face.

"I'm not trying to _avoid_ anything, I just really don't like Lady GaGa. She's just not my style, okay? Back off," said Gabi.

_So much for being timid and shy_, thought Quinn. Gabi's tiny figure beamed off rays of anger and something else. Quinn couldn't put her finger on it, but she definitely could tell that Rachel's little speech made something in Gabi's mind tick.

"I'm just _saying_, you shouldn't be exempt or allowed special privileges. We're a _club_, Gabrielle. We function as _one_," Rachel pointed out. "It wouldn't be fair if one person could do whatever he or she wanted to do, right?"

"I'm still _doing_ the assignment." Gabi's jaw was clenched and she looked like she was ready to walk over to Rachel and punch her in the face. "I'm not asking for special privileges, I just don't want to do the song that you guys _chose_. I understand how a _club_ works, thank you very much; I'm not _brain dead_. Maybe you need to get over the fact that not everyone wants to do things _your_ way."

Quinn could definitely agree with Gabi's last statement.

"Well if you know how _teams_ work," Rachel started, obviously annoyed, "you should _understand_ that you performing a number alone does not constitute what a _team_ stands for."

"Girls, girls, girls!" Mr. Schuester finally cut in and interrupted their argument. He raised his arms, signifying that Rachel and Gabi should both wave their white flags and cease-fire. Neither of them looked like they wanted to consent. Rachel still had that usual, haughty look on her face, and Gabi's face told Quinn that she wasn't ready to retract her claws. "Please, stop. Gabi—you can perform your own number, but just this once. Rachel—just, calm down. Please. We're all a family here, okay?"

"Sorry, Mr. Schue," said Rachel.

Gabi glared at Rachel and stormed off.

"Okay," Mr. Schue sighed. "Let's get started, shall we? Girls? Kurt?"

The music started playing, and Quinn stopped caring about the Gabi-Rachel drama. Instead, she focused all of her energy on the song, choreography, and not tripping during the performance—though the latter of the three was the one she gave the most attention to. Quinn was smiling. She hadn't had this much fun since Sectionals! She lifted her head to see the boys' reactions, and saw that they all looked bored, minus for Jesse. Of _course_ they all looked bored. Jesse, however, looked worried.

Sadly, Quinn found herself not caring and she was about to turn to look at Mr. Schue when she noticed Jesse glance around the room inconspicuously. _This_ sparked her attention. He then got up from his seat and left the auditorium. Quinn was curious, to say the least.

She glanced around to find Gabi and noticed that she was still gone.

It didn't take an idiot to piece everything together. She may have stopped _caring_, but that didn't mean she stopped _watching_. Quinn Fabray was as perceptive as they came.

* * *

Gabi sat alone in the choir room, trying not to fly off the handle, but she could feel her anger boiling up and she just couldn't control it anymore. She got up and kicked over a chair, then balled her hands into fists. _Who_ gave Rachel the authority to tell her what she _could_ and _couldn't_ do? What did _Rachel_ know about _sacrifice_? Sacrifice was practically Gabi's _middle name_! She had sacrificed _so_ much ever since Elisabeth—

"Are you okay?" asked Jesse, interrupting her train of thought. He closed the door behind him and locked it shut. "I could tell that what Rachel said about sacrifice upset you."

"Go away," she snarled. "I don't want to be near you."

" If you don't want to talk about Elisabeth," he said over her voice, "we can talk about something else. Your mom, maybe? Your dad? Your grandmother?"

"I already told you, Jesse. I _don't_ want to be near you. Not being near you entails not talking to you about what goes on in my life. It's none of your business anymore."

He got closer to her. "Gabs, please don't do this. I told you, I _know _you. I know your story. If you'd just _talk_ to me, things wouldn't be as bad as they probably are; I could help you _fix_ things. You'd be _happy_ again, but you refuse to allow yourself happiness. Rachel was right; you _are _running away from something—your ability to live for yourself." He took her hands in his. Gabi hadn't noticed Jesse get _that_ close to her. She inched away from him, but he grabbed her. "Don't push away the one person who cares the most—"

"_Don't_ tell me that _you_ care the most about me, Jesse St. James!" she snapped. "I know what I'm doing with my life, whereas I can't say the same for you. What are you doing here at McKinely, Jesse? Spying for Shelby? Gonna go break your _girlfriend's_ heart once Regionals comes along? I'm not _stupid_. I didn't _forget_ how things work at Vocal Adrenaline. You guys play dirty—you're all _foul _people, and you're like, the little leader of the entire gang." Gabi glared at him. He looked so hurt by her accusations, but she didn't give a damn. She was still so angry from Rachel's words, and she felt so betrayed that Jesse took _her_ side. "You may be the only person who really does care about me _right now_, but that doesn't mean it can't change."

"What are you doing with yourself?" asked Jesse. "This isn't _my_ Gabi. What happened to you?"

"Like I said before, people change," she said bitterly. "Now leave me alone. You don't understand what I'm going through."

"Yes I _do_, Gabi," he sighed exasperatedly. He ran a hand through his hair and gave her a look that said: _What the fuck are you talking about?_ "Don't let the fact that I'm dating someone else get in between our friendship—"

_Dating someone else_. Gabi was fuming. He always had to bring it back to himself, didn't he? Of course, he did. He was _Jesse St. Freaking James_. "Get away from me," she gritted. "You don't know _anything_. You don't know what I went through, living alone with my deranged mother, and my power hungry grandmother! You don't know! So just do me and you both a favor, _Jesse_," she spat out his name like it was something disgusting, "just stop talking to me, and leave me alone. I don't need to deal with this anymore. You wanna talk about _friendship_? Maybe you should stop looking out for _Number One_ all the time. If there's one thing I learned about you, it's that Jesse St. James only looks out for one person, and that person is himself."

* * *

_It was three in the morning and Jesse's phone was ringing._

"_What?" he snapped vehemently after he opened his phone. "What could you possibly want at three in the fucking morning?"_

"_Jesse," the voice cried, "Jesse, I had that dream again!"_

_He softened right away. "Gabi, it's only a dream," he told her quietly. Gabi only sobbed harder into the phone. "It's not real, baby. It's not real."_

"_But it _felt_ so real," she sobbed. "I could feel her _hair_, Jesse! I could hear her _voice_!"_

"_Gabi, Elisabeth is gone...you have to accept it. It's not your fault, either. It was an accident. You were only seven, for Christ's sake! It wasn't your fault!"_

"_But I didn't save her! It is all my fault; if I'd just listened to her, if I hadn't been so _stupid_, she'd be here now and I wouldn't be having these nightmares! I wouldn't have to do all this stupid theatre work; I wouldn't have to work this hard to keep her alive inside of me! You know why, Jesse? Cause she'd be here!" Gabi was practically screaming into the phone. Her voice was cracking and she hiccupped after every word._

"_That's a lie, and you know it. You're in theatre because you love it, not because of Elisabeth."_

"_Did you know," she choked, ignoring his comment, "that every time I open my mouth to sing, I think of Elisabeth?"_

"_Gabi, you need to stop this," he said. He needed to calm her down before she did anything stupid._

"_No!" she said fiercely. "You need to listen to me, Jesse. My _grandmother_ keeps pushing me to audition for all these plays, all these musicals, and all these _schools_. She told me that I _have_ to do this—for Elisabeth. My _mom_ still calls me _Elisabeth_ when she's in one of her moods. My _father_—he can't take it anymore. Did you know that he's been cheating on her for over a year now? He's been cheating on her; he's been cheating on _us_. If he'd just _listen_ to me and get her _help_, this wouldn't be happening. Oh God, why is this _happening_, Jesse?"_

"_I can't make her come back, Gabi," Jesse spoke slowly. "I'm sorry, but I can't. The only thing I can do is help you learn how to forgive yourself and move on. You _have _to move on...you can't keep paining yourself like this. It's not healthy for you—"_

"_I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all. It's the least I owe Elisabeth," she interrupted before hanging up._

_Jesse exhaled heavily. He wasn't going back to sleep anytime soon._

_

* * *

_Any guesses as to who this mysterious _Elisabeth_ is? :) And the drama doesn't stop here...another new character will be introduced and things start to go crazy for these poor Glee Clubbers. Ah, I feel kind of bad for the havoc I'm about to unleash on them.


	5. Façades, Stupid Jocks, and Supreme Reign

**Author's Note:** Wow! It's been so long since I updated...so this chapter has been split into two! I love all of you who reviewed / favorited / alerted this story or myself! Answers to reviews are at the end of the update so you don't have a ridiculously long author's note to read! Enjoy, my lovelies! :)

"_Hey, give me space so I can breathe,  
Give me space so I can sleep,  
Give me space so you can drown in this with me.  
Hey, give me space but I can't breathe,  
Give me space but I can't sleep,  
Give me just one inch; I swear that's all I'll need._"

—Space / Something Corporate

* * *

It'd been a week since the Lady GaGa debacle—cause that's what Gabi decided to call it, a debacle—and the Glee Club had returned to an odd balance of normality where Jesse and Rachel carried themselves in their usual haughty manner—though they did this separately, seeing as Jesse still refused to accept Rachel's apology for whatever the 'Run Joey Run' fiasco was—and everyone else scorned them. She thought they were all cowards as they chose not to make a difference or stand, even though it bothered them all that they had to fight for a shot in the spotlight. Gabi understood that they were all too scared of jeopardizing their chance at Regionals; they were all so sure that they'd win since not only did they have _the_ Vocal Adrenaline star: Jesse St. James, but they also had a young, would have been a highly recognized _Broadway_ star if she had stayed in New York City: Gabrielle Adams. She thought it was silly that they had such little faith in themselves. How did they expect to win if they didn't _believe_ they could? Winning was only half the battle. Gabi decided that she would try her best to help them realize they didn't need to depend on her or Jesse to win. It was the least she could do since they all seemed to hate Rachel as much as she did. Plus, she knew from experience that lack of faith only resulted in failure.

You had to want something more than you wanted anything else to make it possible.

However, a little push in the right direction never hurt anyone. She made a mental note to speak to Mr. Schue about giving the others—like Santana, Brittany, Matt, or Mike—a solo, even if it was just during practice.

In her head, she happily hummed St. Vincent's 'Paris Is Burning' while she walked to the show choir's practice room for Glee. Sure, she had been labeled as a theatre geek at Carmel High and as a Glee Club _loser_ at McKinely, but that didn't mean her choice in music was limited. She didn't ever want to feel restricted. Being trapped meant you couldn't make your own decisions, seeing as she already was trapped in a sense, she longed for the feeling of knowing that she was free. So in response to her yearnings, she tried to be broad in her knowledge and favoritism of music; it was the only way she could cope with the daily stresses of having a crazy mother, cheating father, and ruthless grandmother.

Artists like The Pierces, Imogen Heap, Annie Lennox, Lydia, and Iron & Wine were some of her favorites.

"_I'm on your side when nobody is, cause nobody is. Come sit right here and sleep while I slip poison in your ear_," she sang softly. She deliberately chose not to pay any attention to the other person in the room. She knew that talking to Jesse would only ruin her good mood, which was why she had refused to speak to him ever since they were alone in the choir room together.

Jesse, however, didn't seem to care about what she wanted. He spoke to her anyway.

"St. Vincent?" he asked with an arrogant smile. She scowled. He was always acting like he knew her better than she knew herself. "I heard she's coming to Ohio sometime next month. Maybe we could go together? For old times' sake?"

"As delightful as that sounds, I'd rather walk barefoot over needles."

"That sounds rather painful."

"Besides," she continued, "I don't think your girlfriend would appreciate us doing things together for 'old times sake'." She put quotations around the words and rolled her eyes. "And like I said, I'd rather gouge my own eyes out with a spoon."

"I think you said you'd rather walk on needles."

"Aren't you ever the helpful one? Well, I guess I've changed my mind—either way, walking on needles or gouging my eyes out would be a hell of a lot less painful than having to spend an evening with _you_. I think I'd rather—"

"I didn't know that I affected you in such a passionate way," he said sarcastically, interrupting her. His arrogance shined through his eyes, causing his usually attractive looks to fade. That boyish charm he once held, the one that she'd adored so much, was gone. It was like somebody had flipped a switch and gone was the boy Gabi once loved; in his place sat a condescending jerk who was willing to mentally and verbally abuse someone he once cared about because he wasn't content with losing.

And people said sore losers acted the way they did because they weren't satisfied.

Gabi snorted. Jesse seemed pretty content with himself every time he mouthed her off.

In that moment, she hated him with all of her being. She hated the way he gave her patronizing looks every few seconds, and the way his voice held such gratification in knowing how uncomfortable his presence was for her; it just _oozed_ his signature vanity. She wanted a hole to form in the white linoleum tiles of the choir room and for the ground to swallow her whole. She was disgusted and appalled that she had once considered _him_ to be _her_ best friend. He was pitiful—his attempts at belittling her were so minuscule but cleverly devised and placed into his stinging comments, but she still sensed them—with his attempts at breaking her. So, he thought he knew her better than herself? Hah! She would show him! She would show the pretentious prick that she wasn't the same weakling he knew so long ago. She wasn't even the same Gabi she was when she lived in New York. No, she was _different_; she was_ strong_—even if she really wasn't underneath her armor.

She was an actress, after all.

She wondered why she had never noticed how much of a pig he was before, but then again, she supposed it was because his negative qualities had never been directed at _her_.

"I don't," she denied lamely. Her irate thoughts did not stop swirling around her mind, making it difficult for her to concentrate. "Stop talking to me."

"Come on, I bet you haven't been to a concert in ages. Just agree to go with me," he said.

"Please don't pretend to be interested in my life, Jesse; we both know that you don't care. So do me a favor and don't talk to me anymore," Gabi repeated nastily. Her face contorted into an ugly sneer as she sat down in a chair across the room from his. If her words dented his heart—or ego, for that matter—he did a good job of wearing his mask of indifference. "It'll only end in a repeat of words I told you last week."

"Oh boo-fucking-hoo, Gabi," Jesse snarled back at her. "Get over yourself, won't you? I was trying to be your friend. In case you haven't noticed, you don't have any."

Ouch.

Gabi winced. "Oh wow, that really hurts me," she said sarcastically. "Fuck you, St. James. I told you not to speak to me."

"You really wanna walk down that road again, sweetie? Cause we're been there, done that. In fact, I can tell you about every time we ever had sex, if you wanted."

"I said stop speaking to me!"

"Since when did I listen to what you had to say?"

"You're a _sleaze_, Jesse," she said. "Do you get off knowing that within the first five minutes of seeing me again after a year, you successfully managed to make me fall for you all over again, only to have it shoved in my face and hour later? Does that make you happy? Are you _satisfied_?"

"So you _are_ still in love with me." He raised an eyebrow. This infuriated Gabi. Talking to him was like being on a fucking soap opera. He could never decide which mood he liked best, so he was constantly changing his disposition to fit whatever he was thinking. He was so fucking bipolar.

"Fuck off, asswipe."

"_Sticks and stones have made me smarter, it's words that cut under my armor_," Jesse quoted from the song she had been singing earlier.

"Have you ever thought that maybe you should jump off a cliff?" she asked.

"Come now, darling, don't be like that," he drawled.

"Don't be like what? A vindictive bitch? You made me this way, St. James," she said.

Jesse laughed. "I was wondering when you'd show your true self. The whole timid and shy act was very believable, but I knew it wouldn't hold for long."

Gabi merely grunted in response.

"So tell me, Gabs, why the act? Why put up the façade?"

She shrugged. She didn't really want to tell him her reasons, but she found herself doing so anyway. "It was a new town, a new school," she started, "a new beginning."

"I suppose," Jesse smirked.

"Stop talking," demanded Gabi. "I'm sick of hearing your pompous voice."

"You flatter me," he chuckled.

"And you make me want to rip out my hair and then eat it," she deadpanned.

Jesse opened his mouth to respond with another sarcastic remark when Finn walked into the room.

"Hey Gabs." He nodded at her.

Gabi smiled back in return. She motioned for him to sit next to her and he complied.

"So how was your day," he asked, completely ignoring Jesse's angry glare.

"It was fine," said Gabi softly. She could tell that Jesse was extremely angry—for real this time, though. Not like the stupid banter they had exchanged earlier. She also had a vague feeling as to why he was upset, but she didn't care. If _he_ was allowed to have a _girlfriend_, then _she_ was allowed to make friends with _boys_. "How was yours?"

"A lot better now that I finally got to see you." He grinned back at her.

"That's very sweet," she said. She ignored Jesse pretending to barf behind Finn's back and reached out for his hand. "You know, Finn," she started," I'm really glad that I've found a friend in you. It's been really hard adjusting back to Ohio."

"No problem, Gabi." Finn smiled.

Gabi could see Jesse rolling his eyes, and in that moment, all her hate and angst dissipated. In that moment, she loved him. She loved that stupid smirk he made when he knew he was right—he usually was. She loved his silky smooth speaking voice and his ridiculously melodic singing voice. She loved the way his hair curled with such precision, perfectly framing his face. She couldn't get enough of the way he held such disregard in what people thought of him. His self-confidence had always enticed her to plunge deeper into her feelings for him, and she loved the way she couldn't hold her ground around him. She knew she'd never find anyone who understood her more than he.

But she hated him for that, too.

* * *

Mr. Schue was in the middle of introducing the week's Glee Club assignment when Jesse saw Finn nudged her.

"Hey Gabs," he whispered. "What are you doing after Glee today? I was thinking that maybe the two of us could go out for ice cream or something?"

Jesse noticed that like him, everyone in the room had shifted their focus off of Mr. Schue and onto the pair. Everyone in the club—he didn't really count himself to be a part of the 'club' because he was a star, making him a cut above the rest—was so damn nosy.

Gabi blushed a little as she gave a tiny nod. "Sure," she said. He could see the mixture of embarrassment and flatter that swept her face, and he felt his blood boil. Finn had called her 'Gabs' _twice_ in ten minutes. No one was supposed to call her that; it was _his_ nickname for _her_. He was about to say something and then he caught himself. He wasn't supposed to care anymore. Right. He blinked a couple of times. It was time to go back to not caring. However, Jesse couldn't help himself. He knew Gabi was pretty in an obvious way, and that it was hard for people to _not_ be drawn to her—that's what made her such a great actress—but he couldn't help feeling like he should try to intervene with Finn's plans. Finn was too persnickety, too fussy, too undecided to keep up with a girl like Gabi. He also knew Finn didn't have the emotional understanding to deal with her up-and-down personality—or her past, for that matter. Hell, _she_ didn't have the right mindset to deal with her own demons, and he knew that she had plenty! She needed someone more stable and self-assured. He didn't want to name himself as the sole person who fell under that specific category, but he really was the only one who did—at least to _his_ knowledge, he was. So really, he didn't understand why she agreed to go out with Hudson. To be blunt, Finn was simply a dumb jock. He had never seen Gabi tolerate them back at Carmel—they were all just so..._dumb_ and insufferable with their sports-slang, consistent trudging around, and thoughts that they should be the center of attention. Why would Gabi want someone like that? They were not compatible at _all_. Well, if she wanted to see her little ruse to make him _jealous_—he assumed that this was what it was—to blow up in her face, then so be it. Who was he to stop her foolish actions?

Mr. Schue coughed. "Well, um, moving on," he said, "this week's assignment is 'crossroads'. Now, I don't think any of you have noticed, but as a whole, the club is at a crossroad. We're on our way to Regionals, and it's sink or swim, guys. We have to give it our all otherwise this whole year will have been wasted. So for your assignment, I want you to pick a song that relates to whatever crossroad you're currently at in your life. You can pair up in groups or do this individually—I don't care, so long as you all complete the given assignment."

Jesse glanced at Rachel. She was paying such adequate attention to Mr. Schue, and he realized that one of the reasons why he was so attracted to her was because of her strangely obsessive, but all together endearing, dedication to whatever she set her mind to.

But then again, that was also why he was so attracted to Gabi.

He mentally slapped himself. Maybe it was time to finally forgive Rachel for triple casting him in that terrible 'Run Joey Run' video remake. It's not like Puck—or Finn, for that matter—was really his competition, anyway. Like he noted before, they were just dumb jocks.

"Mr. Schue," Rachel's hand shot up in the air. Jesse eyed her appreciatively. She looked back at him and smiled. She knew she was forgiven. "I know it seems a bit soon, but I have the _perfect_ song for the assignment, and I was wondering if you'd let me perform it right now—"

But then again, it was incredibly obnoxious during times like these.

"Actually Rachel," Mr. Schue looked at Rachel apologetically, "Gabi had a song that she wanted to perform. It doesn't relate to the assignment, but she asked me this morning, so I think we should let her go first."

Rachel sent an icy glare at Gabi. "If you say so," she said reluctantly.

Gabi ignored it. "Mr. Schue—it's fine. Rachel—she can perform if she wants to. Like you said, my song doesn't really pertain to the assignment—"

"No, no, Gabi," he argued. He looked at Rachel expectantly. "Rachel doesn't mind, does she?"

Jesse knew she minded, in fact, she minded _a lot_. However, he also knew that Rachel was too competitive to _not_ be polite in the face of her rival. Gabi, on the other hand, didn't have the same worries of politeness.

"Of course I don't mind," said Rachel. There was a false sweetness in her voice. "The spotlight's all yours, Gabi."

"No really," said Gabi, "I insist that you go. I'll just wait for my turn to present my song for the assignment. If you already know what you want to sing, then go for it."

Jesse didn't understand why Gabi was being so nice to Rachel. Wasn't she supposed to hate the other girl for being with him?

Girls. He couldn't live with them, and yet, he couldn't live without them.

"Are you sure?" asked Rachel.

"Just go already," piped up Quinn Fabray. Jesse tilted his head to look at her. She was pretty in a typical blonde cheerleader way, he decided. It was a shame she was pregnant, otherwise he would probably want to ask her out on a date. Then, he inwardly scolded himself. He wasn't supposed to be thinking of other girls when he had a girlfriend. Funny, he never had odd thoughts like these when he was with Gabi. And there it was again—Gabi! He really had to stop! He mentally slapped himself.

_Focus on something happy_, he thought to himself. _Focus on something happy—like watching birds fly through an open, blue sky while they chirp merrily along their way._

Damn. He was turning into a pansy.

"I'm bored and tired of hearing you two talk," Quinn continued. "Someone just sing already or _I _will."

Mercedes snickered into her palm and Santana rolled her eyes.

"I have a song that I could perform, Mr. Schue," said Kurt. "I was thinking maybe I should perform 'Popular' from Wicked on Rachel's behalf—"

"Er—that's not necessary, Kurt," said Mr. Schue. He had a confused, but all together amused, look on his face. Looking at Rachel, he motioned for her to stand at the front of the room to sing. "Rachel?"

Rachel nodded curtly and flounced to the front.

Jesse noticed how _good_ her butt looked in the short, brown plaid skirt she was wearing—but just as soon as he noticed this, he looked away. When they first started dating, he had had an issue with thinking about Rachel sexually; it always just felt so wrong. He thought that maybe once things progressed along—he wasn't sure if he was in it for Shelby Corcoran or because he started to like Rachel anymore—his problem would change, but alas, thinking about her in _that_ way still made him uncomfortable.

"Before I sing," Rachel said, giving the club a knowing look, "I just wanted to say that I don't expect any of you to understand why I chose this song—except maybe Jesse." She threw him a flirty smile.

He didn't know what to do besides graciously return the smile.

* * *

Rachel stood in front of the Glee Club with a big smile on her face.

Finally, Jesse had forgiven her! His forgiveness would ultimately make the song she was about to sing that much more worthwhile.

"I suppose it may be obvious that I chose this song for certain _personal_ reasons," she said as she gave everyone a scathing look, "but I assure you that you are incorrect with your assumptions. I don't even expect you to know what significance this song has in its origination."

"Are you trying to say that we aren't what—as _cultured_ as you are?" Mercedes asked, shaking her head in disbelief. "Cause let me tell you, Little Miss Know It All, you're about as cultured as my—"

"Mercedes," warned Mr. Schue.

Rachel disregarded the outbreak. "Anyway, here I go! Oh, and please," she added with a smile, "please hold all applause for the end of the song."

"_Think of me, think of me fondly,  
__When we've said goodbye.  
__Remember me once in a while,  
__Please promise me you'll try.  
__When you find that, once again, you long  
__To take your heart back and be free  
__If you ever find a moment__Spare a thought for me._"

Rachel imaged herself playing Christine Daeé on Broadway, showing up that stupid Carlotta Giudicelli. Except in Carlotta's place, she imagined Gabrielle Adams—granted, the midget would have to be wearing stilts.

Hey, it was possible.

"_We never said our love was evergreen,  
__Or as unchanging as the sea  
__But if you can still remember,  
__Stop and think of me.  
__Think of all the things  
__We've shared and seen  
__Don't think about the ways things might have been._"

She imagined Gabi's—er, _Carlotta_'s face, blowing up in rage after she, Christine stole the spotlight. Visions of the future soon began pouring in and out of her mind, almost causing her to lose focus of the song. An image of Jesse as Raoul Vicomte de Chagny peeped its way through the confusion, pushing her back into reality.

She couldn't falter if she wanted to be a star.

"_Think of me, think of me waking silent and resigned.  
__Imagine me, trying too hard to put you from my mind.  
__Recall those days; look back on all those times,  
__Thinks of the things, we'll never do.  
__There will never be a day, when I won't think of you._"

Rachel Berry would reign supreme one day and she hoped Gabi got the message loud and clear.

* * *

And now...answers to reviews! :)

**DeceitfulKitten**, Thank you so much! I'm so glad that you're enjoying this story! And haha, I guess I didn't make Elisabeth mysterious enough because yes, she is her sister! :p

**ClanaFan01**, I don't really mean to make Rachel into such a "bitch", it just happens. I actually don't think she's being a bitch, she's just being herself. And I'm not saying that Rachel's a bitch—she's actually my favorite character on Glee! She's so self-assured and confident in her talents, I think that it's hard for her _not_ be the way she is. Hell, if I had her voice, I'd be the same way! And in real life, too! People can hate you for your personality, but I also believe that a part of that hate is generated from jealousy of something else. Jesse might not leave Rachel for Gabi...no one knows yet!

**Lady Isabelle Black**, I'm sorry I made you wait so long for an update! Yes, Elisabeth is Gabi's little sister! I can't tell you if Gabi and Jesse get back together! And I also can't tell you if Finn and Rachel get together! You'll just have to read and find out :)

**thrufirewithoutaburn**, You are like my most favorite person in the entire world. Why? Because you review every single one of my chapters and you have no idea how happy that makes me. Your Jesse POV is here! I hope I delivered! I think that you probably already know Elisabeth is her sister, and yes, it really is sweet that he's the one she called, right? Except, I hope you (and all my other readers) know that the scene where she called him was a flashback of something that happened in their former relationship.

Here's what you can look forward to in the next chapter: **Gabi and Finn go on a date & Rachel confronts Jesse**! Until next time, my darlings!

OH YEAH, and if you haven't already, read this! I promise that if you are Gabi/Jesse fans, you will love this little one-shot based off what might happen in their future. :)


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